Bh am I a chosid ?

Bh

I dress like a chosid.

I wear a black  a hat like a chosid .

I have tzitzit like a chosid .

but am I a chosid?

I do my chitas my rambam even mivztoim.

Go to the mikvah from time to time visit the ohel ,  fabreng , daven ...go to 770 , the Rebbe room etc  .

so I am a chosid .

right ?

but wait . 

what is a chosid?

To learn Chasidus ?

To follow chabad custom ?

To Be mekushur ?

To Go on shliuchus?

To have ahavas Yisroel? 

yes Yes and again yes .. true so very true.    true .

But  after all is said and done . 

what exactly is a chosid ?

what makes a chosid ?

what is the inside of chosid ?

especially a chabad chosid of Dor hasvhi ? 

First lets ask ourselves .

do I think like a chosid?

do i feel what a chosid feels , inside with  the heart .

for that  matter ; what is in my brain and heart ?

Amuna ?  betochun ? simcha?  ahava ?

Im not talking about what u know should be  but how u actually think and value things bemes.

What is ur thinking process?

What gives gives u joy and what disturbs your peace of mind ?

So while I am busy bring Moshiach and  ibernamin de velt have I begun to  ibernamin my self .

Do i have an hishkashrus prnimi to the Rebbe ...is the inside of me a chosid ?

Or is it rl like a goy  or a lhavdil a Y id that never learned Chasidus RL.

  Of course we learned and we learn but do we think ?

Our mind and heart  can be full of kina tava and kovad with Chasidus with shluchus with Rebbe with Hashem ...with ain oid melvadao .

If u wish to be a chosid u must look also  inside ..bekourus befnim to illuminate the darkness with in .

.ober  nisht gnart nor mit am emes...this too is part of shlichus this to is what the Rebbe mont.

  Vulo maybe more then we wish to accept !

With all that and trying on our own .

..still even more then still , but bikar.   mebet az the Rebbe zol hoben rachmonus un helefen.....mit  thilim un   treren because with out the Rebbe RL lo yochul lo we will not achieve klum not befinim and not bachutz .

Vhayo ohr bemeshvosom

Eyes

Bh

Eyes 

Black as coal

Without a soul

eyes looking at me

They used to glitter

they used to shine

A beam of light

A youthful smile

Those eyes now

Do not seem to see

Even as they stare right back at me

One wonders how can it be

Eyes that once seemed to have wisdom

Who searched for goodness in all things

Now see  scepticism ... darkness

 Shadows upon the eyes 

Dark and heavy ....

They  wish now only to close

A badly needed rest

In sleep to ascend

Perhaps a vision of holiness

Will reappear

A picture that endures

of Man's strength

of his true path and  potential

The eyes still stare

tired and drooping

They begin to close

Is it a farewell or to refresh

To look inside

To  become aware

To look upon the good

To see the light

To find  the spark

to restore the soul

To ignite the flame

To hope again

Those eyes in the mirror

Looking back at me

A reflection of myself

Look numb and tired

I pray they do not give up

On man or Gd

Good or bad

To open up before they close

To find and see hope

To ascend to a better place

One that finds strength

To trod  the path

To recreate the vision of the calling

That was once had

With better clarity to go forward

And look with optimism

at  the future ahead

To accomplish the goal

That has been set

Even before creation

To make the world a better place

It was intended to be from the start

Bh simply tanya chapter 1 lesson 5

Bh

Simply Tanya chapter 1 lesson 5

Simply Tanya

ובגמרא ספ"ט דברכות צדיקים יצ"ט שופטן כו' רשעים יצה"ר שופטן בינונים זה וזה שופטן וכוי

Simple Tanya

And in the Talmud at the end of the ninth chapter of tractate berochus we find that in the righteous people the good inclination judges etc in the wicked people the evil inclination judges in the average persons both are judges and etc

Even more  simple .

Every moment in our life we struggle with choices . we are used to to this . the daily grind of being torn apart  by the voices we here in our mind. They are the two inclinations inside of  us who give voice to their opinion . this is the struggle of the average person who pulls back from the edge of the abyss of evil every moment . while the wicked person allows himself or chooses to slip into the darkness which appeals to him .  imagine hearing only one voice , one inclination. The difference between being a Tzadik a Benoni and a Rasha is the opinions they hear . it is not only the choices they make but what  inclinations  they have and  which  "judge" , they "  hear " so to speak .

The tzadik has reached a point where he has rid or the very least nullified or in the best case scenario transformed his evil inclination to good . even the lowest level tzadik  has within  and hears only one judge. The good one.The average person hears both voices , vacillating in his desires for both but yet only in practice choosing one ; good over evil . the benoni never is in practice evil . never embraces the evil . the opposite extreme to the tzadik is  the wicked person who only hears only one voice , as well , that of evil . as the exact opposite of the tzadik he either rid himself of goodness , nullified it or even worse transformed it to evil . it not only is not heard , has no effect , but worse is in exile in him and can be used to fuel greater evil .

To the child 

Educators and parents must tell children . "You have in you good and bad . if at times one over powers the other do not believe that you are complete.  You can be good but yet not a tzadik you may have done bad but you are not a rasha.  Life is not black and white ." don't feel that all is lost or all has been gained . just continue to live ." This is important to for educators as well to know. Children can be very judgmental and unforgiving on themselves.  In there mind they bear the burden of the world . voices heard within are taken seriously emotions and dreams are as if they exist on a physical plan . a child taught to filter within and know that  voices heard within are not necessarily who that are .gd has given us more then one soul . its OK to struggle and be confused . life is a processes and its not where you are on the ladder its about whether you are going up or down .

Not so simple

Why does the Talmud speak in the plural ? Tzadikim  instead of Tzadik  ,
Reshoim instead of rasha , benonim instead of Benoni . should have it not been better to speak in the singular instead of plural .

Also the words "  Shofton " judges is plural as well.  It could have said . " shofat  " judge . especially as we are dealing with the righteous and wicked who actual only hear one judge speak ?

Perhaps we can say that there many levels of the righteous and many levels of the wicked . hence the word in plural.
And certainty the average person who in midst of the struggle hear two opinions for that is the struggle.  Choosing one over the other. This is important for one might say that after you become a tzadik the struggle of good verse evil is over.  Hence the point is that he too must struggle for there are degrees on how much the evil is nullified to good . The same with the wicked even after listening to evil that that does not mean the good has been nullified .

Another point the test of the righteous can at times be greater then others . for his choices are between on good over another . now you might say big deal.  If the tzadik is mistaken he is still doing a mitzvah . what wrong can occur if he is mistaken. Well then think of moshe hitting the rock instead of speaking to it . what wrong occurred ? Well for one he did not enter the land . Secondly he not entering the land changed the course of Jewish history that our process towards Moshiach was altered . finally the Jews missed the opportunity to learn how to serve gd on a higher level .namely if even  a rock can be affected through speech certainty should we. So the wrong choice of a tzadik who has greater responsibility has greater repercussions.  This also explains why the Alter Rebbe " etc" vchulu , at each category , because each category has many variations and levels .

PostScript

It seems the way of the righteous are easy after becoming one . it only has a good inclination that  gives its opinion . so what is the service of the righteous after having subdued evil .  here is a very important point though  hearing only good choices are still needed to be made . how so you ask , if there is only one opinion ? Because , being a tzadik does not mean the end of growth ,it means constant growth but in goodness . not growing from bad to good but from good to even better.
So the choices of the tzadik can be even more difficult because he needs to choose between two good choices and actually figure out which one is the correct one. The average person or  wicked person choice is more black and white , clear . Do I do the mitzvah which is Gd will or do I rebel and sin . do I do what is good or evil. The righteous person is choosing between do I do this good thing or that good thing , this mitzvah or that one . mistakes can happen even for a tzadik on a subtle level . its more like being perfect and not doing anything wrong but yet still  perhaps a greater perfection could have been achieved . 

another point to make is , even the average person has parts of him that are like a tzadik or rasha with regard to a specific behavior . in either of these situations the problem is not trying to change for the better . gd willing this will discussed later  . however the point is when we have reached a point within where a good or evil act has become one with us to the point of not struggling with it . we have in that matter either become a tzadik or rasha in that space of our soul .

Simply Tanya chapter 1 lesson 4

Simply Tanya

צדיק וטוב לו צדיק ורע לו  רשע וטוב לו רשע ורע לו  ובינוני. ופירשו בגמרא צדיק וטוב לו צדיק גמור צדיק ורע לו צדיק שאינו גמור

Simple Tanya

The  righteous person for whom it is good  , the  righteous person for whom it is bad. The wicked person for whom it is good , the wicked person for whom it is bad .  The average person . The Talmud explains that the righteous person for whom  it is  good is because he is completely righteous and the righteous person for whom it is bad is because he is not completely righteous .

Even more  simply

Here the Alter Rebbe is introducing who are the " five groups " mentioned early . They are really three that divide into five.
More so , he informs us that there can be various types of righteous and wicked people . He also takes the time to point out the reason for why the righteous suffer and the wicked prosper .

To the child

Even while still  a child , know righteous person can have levels of righteousness and degrees .  The righteous person might have areas that still need improvement .  also though the wicked person might  be completely wicked he yet may still  have some good in him . Life as a whole  is many times a mixture of good and bad . thus don't be discouraged if things don't seem to be working out to your liking . As a child you might wish to view the world as black and white , good or bad , that is true but not  always is it identifiable as such . more importantly know that  every good you do has value even if you feel the majority is bad ,  conversely every bad you do diminishes something,  even if the majority is still good. Hence you must constantly strive regardless of what level you currently are at .

Not so simple

Why does the Alter Rebbe use this Talmudic source to introduce the Tzadik , Rasha and Benoni ?

Are there not other place ?

Why does he not explain the wicked person who prospers and the wicked person who suffers ?

Why does he not explain the Benoni ?

If he is prosperous or suffering ?

Also why the need to bring the complete quote of the  Talmud explaining the the reason why a righteous person suffers .

Just showing how there are five various levels of people ,  should be sufficient ?

Also why does he not say where in the Talmud he is quoting , as he does sometimes in other places .

You cannot say its because he is quoting the Talmud hence he needs to quote  it in its entirety . remember everything in the Tanya is exact , every letter the Alter Rebbe had a reason for it . also the Tanya being like Chumash can be taught to the five year old as well as to the scholar . The beginner and the advanced . The five year old student level knows chumash but not Talmud .

Is there something to be gained by quoting the  complete text ?

Later he will quote the Zohar , why not conclude all text of the Talmud on the subject and then quote Zohar .

I think perhaps we can say that , first the Alter Rebbe is teaching via the Talmud that we may question Gd , not to discard our faith but to understand Him better . Hence , why do righteous suffer and the wicked prosper ?  The Alter Rebbe then must explain  that it is because they are not complete in what they are . the suffering or prosperity will complete them .
However once the Alter Rebbe does bring this up he needs to explain that incomplete righteous does not mean someone who simply is  committing a sin Gd forbid in fact the evil is nullified to the good , the problem is that nullification of something implies there is a residue of it there . Thus the need for quoting the Zohar / rahya mhemna right away to make that idea clear . The incomplete Righteous person is free from sin only inside he has a nullified piece of evil . plus this is the entire  basis of the alter Rebbe tanya , that the righteous and wicked we are dealing with is the state of nullification of evil and self nullification of the soul to Gd , not good and evil of thought speech or action but of the soul itself in its struggle of transformation .

Postscript

There are many levels to a person . many a time a person can be a mixture of good and evil. Be careful how you judge another for you do not who is completely righteous nor who is completely wicked . some one might suffer because they not righteous enough or for other reasons while another might prosper because it is to punish them . Hence judgment is left better to Gd . looking at yourself you also cannot be sure all the time who you are hence do not be arrogant or overly confident in your self on the hand . on the other , it might be best not to dwell to much on your inner self , to much soul search will leave you lost , and not give you the clarity you seek .

Simply tanya chapter 1 lesson 3

Bh
Simply Tanya

אך הענין כי הנה מצינו בגמרא ה' חלוקות

" However the idea is that we find in the Talmud five differences "

Simple Tanya

The Alter Rebbe in his explanation how the oath encourages one to be righteous first points out that various levels exist .

Even more simple

The Alter Rebbe is addressing himself to the spiritual seeker . telling  him , " keep this in mind as you begin your  journey of your  soul on earth . there are various levels of achievement , you do not need to be on the top rung nor the bottom one in. Growth is measured in many ways . what you need to do is will find the level that is appropriate for you .

To the child

Gd created difference in each of us . it does not mean we are better or worse then another . each person is unique . as a child and adult respect each person ,  do not judge or treat a person different just because they are different . don't try to be some one else , try to find out who you are and be yourself .

Not so simple

Why did the Alter Rebbe use the word in חלוקות  to describe differences , he could have used the word מדריגות  levels ?

The world חלק means , " part  " as part of something else but also means  "apart " and separate . possibly the Alter Rebbe is telling us that each one is not just a different level but one is completely apart from the other . 
On the other hand though each is apart and one should not confuse one with the other , each does have a certain element and blend of each and with work and divine assistance one can become a level that was initially separate from him .

Postscript

I find this sentence in the Tanya so amazing. This is  Alter Rebbe first time in Tanya where he says , "  אך הענין " - "However the idea is " . and with it he begins to explain all the questions he asked early . until  now he quoted the oath  and asked questions on it and now he is beginning to explain . How does he begin not by immediately  explaining the oath but by introducing the concept that their are various types of people . this in and of itself gives the spiritual seeker a breath of fresh air that he know he will eventually find his place . The alter Rebbe in his love for his fellow Yid is saying , even before he tells us about righteous people , wicked people , average people he is first informing us " don't worry what type of person you are and if and how much you can achieve , that is the next step . the first step is to know Gd had made differences is man and your job is to work with what you have !

Simply tanya chap 1 lesson 2

Bh

Simply Tanya

( tanya for everyone )

וצריך להבין דהא דתנן [אבות פ"ב] ואל תהי רשע בפני עצמך וגם אם יהיה בעיניו כרשע ירע לבבו ויהיה עצב ולא יוכל לעבו' ה' בשמחה ובטוב לבב ואם לא ירע לבבו כלל מזה יכול לבוא לידי קלות ח"ו .

How ever we need to understand ( the words of the oath) , for we learnt [ ethics of our father's  chapter 2 ] one should not be a wicked person in their own eyes ( then why does the oath say to do so ) . also if one does view themselves  like a  wicked person it will be detrimental to their emotional state that they become depressed and not be able to serve Gd with joy and a gladden heart . and even if the person does not allow it ( the thought he is wicked )  to sadden him at all , it can then  lead him to becoming Gd forbid lax in observance  ( for in his mind he is wicked in any case ) . 

Simple Tanya

The oath given to the soul before being born is to help it  fulfill its life purpose .
What benefit can there from it  thinking it is like a evil person ? One who is indeed evil need to know that they are evil in order to repent . however one who is being told he is a righteous person and  can be mistaken into thinking he is truly righteous , should be told  to doubt what people are saying . but  why the need to tell him think he is like a wicked person ?

Even more simple

An oath is supposed to encourage you . How can an oath that is meant to encourage you have a clause in it that you should always see yourself like as failure . worse , if you do see your self as a failure you will end up failing .

To the child

Even if you see your self as wicked do not give up. Try again and you will succeed. More importantly is for you  to put in the effort , even if it seems not to be effective,  then  worry whether your  succeeding and achievement .

Not so simple

Why does the Alter Rebbe focus his questions on the part of the oath , " and even if the whole world says you are righteous be in your own eyes as wicked " ? Who is he speaking to or for what goal to explain ?

The part of the oath that says , " be righteous " according to what the Alter Rebbe will explain later what a truly righteous person is , not every ones  is capable of that . so what is the point of administering this   oath to every soul  ?

The fact the Alter Rebbe addresses his   questions to the part of the oath dealing with thinking your wicked makes sense  because he is using these questions as a platform to introduce the "Benoni" the "average person" and this part of the oath is directed more to him then the others ( as we shall see later ).

But then why quote the first part of the oath , " be righteous " its not relevant to us ?   The part not to be wicked is important because all can accomplish that so he quotes it . but why mention being a tzadik ; righteous ?

Perhaps we can say that though the primary function of the Book of the Tanya is for the average person. He  whose main struggle is  not be wicked nor ever becoming like the righteous . Yet the Alter Rebbe is really speaking to every Jew . indeed every Jew , even the righteous might need to struggle with the battles of the average person in early stages of his development . also the average person must know that Gd can perhaps have mercy on him and allow to become completely righteous . the wicked to must know though at the lowest rung he can climb back to stop being wicked and from there average to even above average , righteous . 

Post script

The fact the author of the tanya bothers to even ask the question of how thinking your are wicked will trouble the Jew reflects on the Alter Rebbe sensitivity to the Jew who is working to serve Gd . more so it conveys to the Jew working on himself that his emotions must be part of serving Him. He cannot tell himself nor can we tell another , " forget about emotions , if the oath says think your like a rasha , think that !" " do so even forcefully "! " regardless of all evidence to the contrary , just repeat and think in your mind you are wicked " . To the hills your emotions "!
The Baal Hatanya says , no ! It is improper to do so unless it is true for it will effect your emotional state and even worse , action .

Finally emotions must reflect reality . Emotional feelings of self evaluation must true and express our  true current status of serving Gd . acting like you think your wicked when in your heart you believe to be righteous and then by the part of being humble and a hidden saint is not only dangerous but false .

Bottom line , emotions as well are a valid part of serving Gd .

Bh simply tanya chapter 1 lesson 1 iyh

Bh

23 Tammuz ramak yartziet

Simply Tanya

( tanya for everyone )

פרק א תניא [בספ"ג דנדה] משביעים אותו תהי צדיק ואל תהי רשע ואפי' כל העולם כולו אומרים לך צדיק אתה היה בעיניך כרשע
Tanya :

we learnt ( learnt in the end of the 3 rd  chapter of tractate niddah ) : " the soul is made to swear - be righteous and do not be wicked , and even if the entire world says to you , you are righteous ! You should be in your own eyes as wicked " .

Simple Tanya :

In order for the neshomo to be successful in its mission on earth it is administrated an oath before it is born to help it do what is  right in gd eyes while in a body .

The different parts of this long oath all deal with the various levels the neshomo may find itself while on earth in its struggle against the inner evil within us .

The oath serves as a guide to the soul what it needs to do.  It also empowers it to be able to do so.

In example by making the neshomo  swear to " be righteous and not wicked " it lets the neshomo know it should strive to be righteous and at the very least not sin . the oath too  at the same time  empowers it  with extra strength to actual do so .

Later more of the meaning of the oath will become clear as the alter Rebbe explains the various level we go through in life while fighting the evil inclination and animal soul within .

Even more simple

The alter Rebbe is letting us know that life has a purpose . being born is not an accident and life events are not coincidences but a planed divine event .
That life's purpose is not the pursuit of the physical.

To the child 

Don't give up . even if you failed before . you have it in you from before your  birth  the power to succeed .

Life is clear . we know what we need to do . the goal is to be righteous and over come all obstacles in the way to achieve this .

The simple path of following Gd  is  the best .

Not so simple

Is there a message in the alter Rebbe telling us the source in talmud for the oath :  " the 3 rd chapter of niddah

Why does the soul need an oath to do gd will ? Doesn't the soul wish to do that even without an oath ?

The oath seems repetitive . " be righteous and do not be wicked " . if one is righteous are they then not wicked ?

Why the concern with what others think . " and even if the whole world says.... "

In general the oaths seems to long and how does it benefit the soul if once in a body it might not remember it any longer .

Point to ponder . what does the oath empower ? The mind , heart  , action ?
We know that if not for Hashem helping the person , he would not be able to over come his annual soul / yetzer hora .
Is this oath part of how Hashem helps him ?

Post script :

A really simple lesson here is that we all have free choice . besides the soul being empowered by the oath to be righteous and not wicked , it sends a powerful message to the soul . " you have free choice " if not how can we tell the soul what to be.  What to choose . because the soul and thereby every Jew had free choice it can be made to swear , which add power to him to make the free choice .